Is change always a good thing ?

She willingly embraced change
Even though it felt strange.
The mind and heart had to arrange

It was the right thing to do , she thought
What was at stake ? what was the cost ?
She dint know then, she was lost.

She turned from caring to a harsh soul.
Dint bother anymore, her innocence it stole.
Time bought more changes, she moved deeper into the hole.

Friendship dint have the same meaning anymore.
She developed an ego, a trait she dint have before.
She cried in pain, every tear made her more sore.

Her degree of kindness dropped to a lower level.
Circumstances made her indifferent, she became a tarnished jewel.
life showed hope sometimes but then snatched it back with a quick swirl.

She put up a fierce fight.
But the changes forced a way inside, stuck tight.
She hugged them hoping for a positive light.
A penalty for being brave, she lost herself in the darkness of night.

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A decade and counting

IMG00372-20120218-2026Innocent adolescence
Best describes the time of our first meeting.
I was this shy little girl and you were the new boy in town trying to fit in.
Not too fond me you were back then
I was quiet, I was shy and safe to say a simpleton.
You were introverted too.
It was your sarcastic humour that got you through.
At least I thought so then.
It was gossip not humour
That made you popular.
And that’s how we became friends.
We were even teased and I still don’t understand why.
It was a phase we both loved,we talked we shared;time just flew by.
Things became better then
You moved away
And It gave us both our very first. I miss you moment.
We talked in-depth and detail.
Shared every single event of every single day.
Lived every emotion with each other.
Our bond got stronger and deeper within.
Things changed again.
Life and struggle came our way.
We fought we argued
We misunderstood and at times we couldn’t explain.
Though harsh but honest words we made it through countless days.
In each other we always believed.
That’s why we are here today.
Things once again got a new look.
Together we grew up to write a chapter of a book.
You are fond of me now, and i feel special knowing it.
At this point all I wanna say is thank you
For being around and giving our friendship all it took.
You are about to write a new chapter.
And I am ready to be your best man in it.
This for me is another I miss you moment.
For you this is divine happiness
Cease the moment,cherish it.

The U turn of Friendship

“Ek ladka Ladki kabhi dost nahin ho sakte.” The famous dialogue from the Bollywood hit Maine Pyaar Kiya, is that truth in any friendship which the two people involved in it keep on denying till one of them finds a partner. Either this happens or the involved guy and the girl become partners themselves.In both the scenarios the friendship which they shared before finding partner or becoming a couple in love themselves, changes.

The cases where they fall in love with each other are the ones that can be called the fairy tale romance with a happy ending. At some point hey realize that the tag “just friends” was only because up till now they failed to comprehend their own feelings.

The difficult ones are those in which when one of the friend finds a partner.  f

We were friends and will always be.
Only the dimensions are altered and now restricted
You are you and I am still the same me.
Only new boundaries are set, somewhat adjusted.

The friend who is left behind feels the pinch slightly more. The one who finds a new companion will actually not feel the difference at all. He/she having found a new life embraces and gets involved in it and barely gets the time to realize and comprehend the changes arising in the friendship.  The one who does not find a partner is the one who has to take the U turn and walk back.

On one hand the friend has to cope up with the redefined dimensions of the old friendship and on the other hand he/she is also expected to build up a good rapport with the friend’s partner. Every single thing from the number of times they talk in day, how they behave in each other’s presence to the content of the conversation changes. Sharing of every detail definitely does not happen any longer.

  The friend who has found a partner also finds it difficult. His/her certain actions and lack of time might hurt the friend but they are rarely intentional. He/she only does what is supposed to be done. I.e. spend more time with the partner.

The third angle which is added to the straight two way friendship brings about a lot of changes. The partner in most cases always has a problem with the closeness of the relation between the friends. Trust issues come under a serious scanner. Even if the partner and the friend do develop a healthy cordial relation, the long close relation of the friend keeps popping up at the back of the head.

Sometimes even the friend cannot get himself/herself to accept the change and end up fighting and making the situation even worse. The friend might not be able to become the second fiddle and gradually backs off to make life simpler for all 3 of them.

If the left out friend also finds a partner then the situation regains balance but if not then he/she is the one who losses out on the friendship and cannot even complain about it for the risk of being accused of immaturity and lack of understanding and support by the friend.

Situations like these are a natural occurrence. No one should be blamed. Over a period of time every close friendship involving a guy and a girl does change. It is inevitable.

Don’t give up on the friendship, restart it.
Redefine its meaning, live the change
A small talk will also be enough.
To adjust in the new limits, is the beauty of it.

P.S. views expressed in this blog are purely Coincidental. Resemblance to any person is deeply regretted.